Are you a workaholic or overly busy? Do you cram as much as you can into every day and every weekend? This is unhealthy according to the New York Times. Being overly busy is a way some people attempt to show status in the article The Case For Doing Nothing. Some people think that because I have so much to do, I am important.

I wonder how long someone can keep their plate so full before they eventually crash, develop significant anxiety or depression? If someone is a workaholic, how to they have time for relationships? These people have a hard time being, because they are constantly doing.

My guess is you know some of these people. Perhaps you feel like a slacker because they can accomplish 2-3 times more things than you can. Maybe they are a workaholic, and you have life-work balance. These people seem to live life at such a fast pace, and may not even know how to slow down.

Perhaps you hear a student talking about how many all nighters they have done to show how busy they are. Are these people actually working from sunup to sundown? Or do they just start late?

Why people become workaholics

In an experiment conducted by Silvia Belezza PhD, it was found that the busier a person was, the higher their status appeared. This was true for U.S. culture but different from other cultures such as Greece, Italy, and other European countries. Europeans have much more vacation time than those in the U.S. They might think the exact opposite. That is, you are seen as having higher status if you have more free time vs. if you are working all the time.

I’ve seen this over scheduling in friends, colleagues and clients. Some clients wonder why they have so much anxiety, and then you find out they have an 80-hour workweek. There is no balance for these workaholics.

Life is so much more pleasant if you can learn to just be. This much easier said than done. The article goes on to talk about a Dutch term for relaxation called niksen. It is the art of doing nothing. Not even being mindful or meditating, but doing nothing. When have you ever thought of doing that?

You might think it sounds boring. That is actually the point. Supposedly this inspires creativity and makes you more alert. It helps slow down that monkey brain (jumping from one thought to the next, your to do list, etc). Kind of sounds like daydreaming and letting your mind go. It does make sense. When you think about it, if you are so busy doing, when do you have time to really think? Your mind is so full of other things, how can there be any space for creativity?

Does the thought of this practice go against everything you know to be true? We are taught to be more productive etc. This is the opposite of what you probably have been taught. You might want to try it and see what happens. Try to do this without judgment or expectations.

How to build niksen if you are a workaholic

Is there is time of day when your mind tends to wander or you are more likely to daydream? If so, why not set a timer and do this for 10-15 minutes at that time of day. See what happens

Times of frustration

We all have these in our day. How do you normally react when your computer screen freezes, your computer takes a long time to boot up, you are in a long line at the store, or you are stuck in traffic? You can get impatient or frustrated, but that will get you nowhere. Take these moments as reminders to do nothing.

Don’t judge yourself

Have you ever looked at your cat or dog and wish you could be them? Their life is so easy. They lie around in the sunspot, eat, drink, and play. Most of their time is laying around doing nothing. They are niksen masters. We can learn from our pets.

Designate a place to practice this

Is there an area of your home that doesn’t have a lot of clutter around it? Perhaps there is a place that is serene, or right by a window to stare out of. If there are distractions and things to pick up-like electronics, these will get in the way of your doing nothing. Try to remove these items to make this practice a little easier.

Go outside

If it is too difficult to be inside and do nothing, go outside. Sit in a chair in your backyard or out on your balcony. This isn’t about being mindful and aware, it is about just letting your mind go.

If you think you might be a workaholic, or need to work on work-life balance, give me a call at 713-304-6554.