Would you be surprised if one of the best things you can do for your health and happiness may actually be the company you keep? I just read a great article in the New York Times about the impact of positive people. It really made me appreciate the ways in which the people in my life support me.

Positive people who lift you up

Have you ever been around someone who makes you feel like a million bucks? Perhaps they gave you their undivided attention and made you feel like the most important person in the world. Maybe you have that friend who has your back that you can always count on.

What about your childhood friends? Are some of them still in your life? These people know you and love you for who you are. They are like family.

Because positive people are the ones who lift you up, they are also the ones who can impact the way you take care of your health. If you interact with people who exercise regularly, you are more likely to exercise too. There has been research on areas of the world where people live longer than in other areas, called Blue Zones.

Blue Zones

These are areas of the world where people live longer than other areas of the world. Gianni Pes and Michel Poulain have done research in this area and found that they have 9 similar lifestyle habits that impact their life-expectancy. These areas include Okinawa, Japan, Sardinia, Italy, Nicoya, Costa Rica, Ikaria, Greece and Loma Linda, California.

Lifestyle habits of positive people

These lifestyle habits include “moving naturally (not relying on modern conveniences for home and garden), have a daily purpose, methods for decreasing stress, stop eating when 80% full, rely mostly on a plant based diet, alcohol on a moderate basis, belonging to a faith community, put their families first, and a healthy support system of people.

Moai

In Okinawa there is something called a moai, which include 5 people who give support in all areas over a lifetime. Parents put their children in these groups at birth. This group supports each other in good times and in bad. These groups also impact health and wellness.

Blue zone research

Dan Buettner studies people in these blue zones and is currently doing research in Fort Worth, TX. He has created a group people who will walk and socialize on a regular basis. Other moas are based on eating habits, such as plant-based diet. During the study people agree to engage in these behaviors over a 10-week period. Buettner says these groups are still impacting each other in a positive manner over years. The key to forming these groups is putting people who are in close geographic proximity and have similar interests.

Who are the positive people in your life?

Who in your life is there for you? When you are down or life throws a curve ball, do you have someone who can hold you up? These are the times that are critical in life. We all need a social safety net. For some people, it is family. It may be your friends, religious, spiritual or exercise group. Maybe it’s being a part of the community in some other way, something that helps you feel that you are not alone.

You want to fill your life with people who will help you through it. Life is too short and difficult at times, knowing we have someone to share our joy and pain with is crucial.

Brené Brown

Brené Brown has a great story about a candle. She says that in your palm is a lit candle, which represents your soul and spirit. You should surround yourself with people who will protect that flame, even when it is burning bright. These are positive people. Do not spend it with people who want to blow out your candle.

Expand life expectancy

Buettner says that the most critical thing you can do to expand your life expectancy is to surround yourself with 3-5 people who will be there for you when life is tough and will lift you up. These are the people who will help your candle shine bright. Focus on that small group of people. He says, “This group of friends are better than any drug or anti-aging supplement.”

Life is too short and it takes time to have a friendship. So focus on those who are best for you. Your 500 Facebook friends are not the ones who can truly be there for you.

I have been blessed with a group of lifetime friends. We all swam together in high school. There are 6 of us. We communicate via text on a weekly basis sharing life’s ups and downs. I also have a few very close friends where I currently live. These ladies are my lifelines. I hope you have people like this in your life.

If you struggle in your social circle or finding people who will help your candle shine bright, therapy can help. Please give me a call at 713-304-6554.

Take care,

Debbie