Emotional Baggage

What kind of emotional baggage are you hanging on to that you need to let go of? Is there some hurtful event in the past? Maybe you had your heart broken, you had a critical parent, you were the black sheep of the family, had a job loss, or didn’t get the job you wanted. I’m not talking about events that may have led to Post-traumatic stress disorder, which is in a different category in itself.

Often time’s life doesn’t turn out, as we’d like. Events occur in all of our lives that hurt our feelings or really shake us up. Perhaps one or a few of these events has really stuck with you and may even impact your current behavior. Some people carry this hurt and don’t let it go. It is like carrying a lot of heavy baggage that you don’t need to lug around.

Broken heart

I believe this type of emotional baggage occurs in just about everyone’s life. If it has never happened to you then you are one of the lucky ones. Do you remember your first love? Most of us don’t end up with that person, yet this is the one that seems to have a huge impact on us. Even if you are happily involved or married to someone else, you most likely remember that first one. Or on the flip side, maybe you did marry the love of your life, but for some reason, that relationship didn’t work out. Most people get past this, yet a few become hardened when love didn’t turn out the way they wanted. If you have fallen in love once, you will most likely fall in love again.

Critical parent

Welcome to the club. Many people have a parent that they deem critical. Some parents are more extreme than others and I hope that wasn’t you. We all want to be loved and accepted by our parents. Of course we will disappoint them at times, as no child is perfect. So even if our parents were not overly critical some of their words or discipline may have hurt our feelings. This is a common type of emotional baggage. Granted some parents are abusive, and those words are even harder to get past. The saying, ‘sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me’ isn’t quite true. Words hurt. However, just because they are spoken doesn’t mean they are true.

Job loss

In today’s world, if you work for someone other than yourself, it is likely that at some point in time you will either be laid off or lose your job. Or if you live in Texas and your job is based on the oil and gas industry, you will most likely experience some type of down turn. Sometimes, a job is not a good fit for you or the company and you may be let go. While this is embarrassing and a disappointment you don’t need to carry the anger about it as a badge of courage. Have faith that you will find another job. It may not be the perfect job, but you may need to take something until you can find that perfect job.

Black sheep

Are you the black sheep of your family? Or perhaps one of your siblings is the golden child. Sometimes children have different personalities or different likes and preferences than their parents or siblings. Maybe you aren’t as bright or as gifted as one of your brothers or sisters. My guess is that you are better, smarter or more athletic in other ways. You most likely have some skills that you are not giving yourself credit for. Even if you don’t, that is OK, you are you and that is good enough.

These are just a few types of emotional baggage that people tend to hang on to. I’m sure there are many more as we all have them. Some do carry more baggage than others, and some travel lightly. Dragging all this emotional baggage will only bring you down. You know it’s filled with junk that you no longer need, so why not let it go?

You can learn to let go of some of your baggage, as it takes a lot of energy to keep holding on to it. Going to therapy can help you learn to leave some of the emotional baggage behind, never to be picked up again. If this is something you need help with, please call me at 713-304-6554.