Is there someone in your life who suffers from depression? Do you feel helpless as how to help this person? Perhaps you live with someone who struggles and you don’t know what to do. Two different people may have very differing symptoms. Understand that it is not just mind over matter. Here are some things you can do to help:

  1. Talk to the person and let them know you are concerned about them.
  2. Be sure they are getting adequate sleep and are eating properly. Both of these have a big effect on mood.
  3. Let them know it is not a sign of weakness to get help. It is actually a sign of strength to do so. Therapy and medication are known to be helpful. Help the person find a therapist or medical professional.
  4. Be there to listen to your friend or loved one. Knowing that they have your support can be a lifeline. You don’t need to fix anything you just need to listen.
  5. Know that you are not responsible for their depression, and it is out of your control. Only the person with depression can determine their course of treatment (unless they are suicidal).
  6. Try to reassure them. People with depression often have some negative thinking patterns that can make their mood worse. Let them know how much you value them and the wonderful qualities that they have.
  7. Ask if you can help them. Perhaps the person has a lot of chores etc. and you can take a few things off their plate.
  8. Exercise with the person. Exercise has been shown to be more effective than therapy or medication. If you can at least encourage the person to walk daily it can improve their mood.
  9. If they are religious, perhaps praying with them or going to church/temple with them can help.
  10. Engage in a hobby or fun activity. Doing so can help the person focus on something else. Most people who are involved in a hobby are not considering their mood. Perhaps your loved one likes to play a musical instrument, go to movies or museums.
  11. Do yoga together. This has also been found to be helpful for depression.
  12. Encourage them to do things on this list, but don’t force them. Doing so will only make them dig in their heels even more.
  13. Be patient. Depression will not go away overnight, it takes time.
  14. Ask the person if they are thinking of hurting themselves. Having thoughts of wanting to end their pain is different than having a plan (which indicates a higher likelihood of an attempt). Call 911 or take the person to the nearest emergency room if you are concerned about them hurting them self.

This list may be helpful. Speaking with someone yourself may not be a bad idea.  Living with a loved one with depression is difficult. Just know that there are many avenues for help. Give me a call at 713-304-6554 and I can share the tools that have been shown to be helpful.

Take care,

Debbie Grammas, PhD