The past few blogs have focused on negative thinking patterns and assumptions that people make when looking at their body. I remember reading about a research study mentioned in Cash’s Body Image Workbook. In this study they painted a scar on the participant. Then the person with a scar on their face was supposed to have a conversation with another participant who had no idea about the painted scars. Then they were supposed to share how they felt when talking to this stranger. The people with scars on their faces felt self-conscious and that the strangers treated them differently. They thought the strangers were focusing on the scar. However, what the participant didn’t realize was that their fake scars had actually been removed prior to talking to the stranger. This shows, that we can make assumptions about what others are thinking, and we are wrong.

It is important to work on this negative thinking and change the way you look at yourself. I know this is a lot easier said than done, but here are some things that may help.

  1. Stop avoiding the things you want to do, even if these set off triggers of body image distress. The more you avoid something, the greater the fear grows. This means you go to the beach, the pool party, or some place you won’t be able to cover up and hide. Yes, you will be uncomfortable to start with. Recognize that you are harder on yourself than anyone else. Would you ever say anything to a friend of yours that you say to yourself? Are you assuming that people are thinking something negative about you? My guess is that you are wrong. Most of us cannot mind read, and it is not probable that others are thinking the same way you are.
  2. There are things you can do to face the anxiety you feel about you appearance. There are many different relaxation techniques that you could practice prior to going someplace that will make you feel self-conscious. Perhaps you already do some of them such as mindfulness, meditation, guided imagery, and body scanning or progressive muscle relaxation. Yoga is also wonderful for that mind-body connection.
  3. Come up with a plan to help you to do whatever it is you want to avoid. Set goals. Perhaps you might want to start in small steps-gradual exposure. That might mean you go to the beach and wear a cover up over your bathing suit. The next time you wear your cover up and take it off for a short time period, and then increase the time you leave it off. Prior to going to the beach, practice one of the relaxation techniques listed above. Afterwards you might want to reward yourself with something small for a job well done.

If your body image distress prevents you from doing the things you enjoy in life, therapy can help. Give me a call at 713-304-6554.

Take care,

Debbie