If you aren’t in a relationship and want to be, Valentine’s Day can be a difficult holiday for you. It could be that you are grieving the death of your partner. Maybe all your friends are in a relationship and you aren’t. Regardless, it is something you miss and you may be noticing all the people around you, paired up and happy. Any of these scenarios can be upsetting. It may be easier to get past this most of the time, but Valentine’s Day makes it a little more challenging.

I certainly don’t want to minimize your feelings, yet I would like to give you some suggestions to make this holiday a little more bearable.

Valentine’s Day Activities for Singles

Treat it like any other day

Valentine’s Day is a Thursday. Since it is the middle of the week, my guess is you do nothing on an average Thursday evening. So why not treat it like any other day of the week and engage in your normal routine.

Have other single people over to your home

My guess is you have some friends who are also in the same boat. Nothing beats loneliness like spending time with others. No need to stay home and feel sorry for yourself.

Go out with your friends

There are plenty of bars, clubs, and venues that have events for singles on Valentines Day. Scope them out and find some place that looks like fun to you. Stay away from the places that are swooning with couples.

Treat yourself to a spa

How about getting a massage, manicure or pedicure? If that isn’t your thing, what can you to do pamper yourself? Maybe you’d like to stay home and take a long bubble bath. Do something special or a little out of the norm. You deserve it.

Spend time with your pets

Most of us who work and have pets feel guilty at times, as we don’t get to give our pets the attention they’d like. Why not honor your furry friends? Get them a special toy, or hang out on the couch with them. They will love it. Our pets give us unconditional love and we are number 1 in their book.

Buy yourself some flowers

If you like flowers, get yourself a bouquet. It doesn’t matter if you buy them for yourself or someone buys them for you. Just enjoy the beautiful colors, textures and smells. Showing self-love is a wonderful quality.

Take the day off

Why not take a vacation day and do all the things you wish you had time to do, but don’t. Perhaps you like going to the movies, shopping, or the museums. Maybe you’d like to take the time to sleep in, catch up on chores and be lazy. Whatever works for you, just do it.

Call your family members or out of town friends

My guess is there are many people who love you and whom you love. Spend some time with them in person or on the phone. What about calling someone you haven’t spoken to in a long time-perhaps an old college roommate? I would assume that there is someone out there who would love to hear from you.

Binge watch Netflix

Is there a series that you have been dying to see? Why not watch several episodes to make the evening go by faster. If not Netflix, is there a favorite movie that you’d like to watch?

Unplug

Don’t go online and see what all your other friends are doing with their partners on Valentine’s Day. This will only make you feel worse. Of course people only post the wonderful things going on in their life. Don’t assume that everything is perfect just because there is this cute picture of them on line.

Obviously this is not an exhaustive list of what to do on Valentine’s Day. I’m sure there are plenty of other things. If nothing on this list works for you look on line and see what else you can find.

If you are struggling due to loss of a relationship, or difficulty in finding one and need some help to get over the hump, give me a call at 713-304-6554.

Take care,

Debbie Grammas, PhD