This is the time of year where people start thinking about their New Year’s Resolutions. It’s common to say that I will exercise more, eat healthier, spend less money, stop smoking etc. How long does that really last? If you make it 2 weeks into the New Year, you are doing well. Why is it so hard to turn healthy routines into habits?
I recently read an article in the Psychotherapy Networker magazine called Breaking the Habit Loop. It mentioned a book by Charles Duhigg The Power of Habit.
Why habits are hard to break
It mentioned that most of us don’t stick with our New Year’s Resolutions because habits are so difficult to break. Many of these are done unconsciously as we go through life on autopilot.
You may wonder why it seems so easy for others who already do the things you wish you could do. The reason is not simple willpower, it’s that these people have already established these as healthy patterns. It’s part of their daily routine as much as brushing your teeth before bed.
The brain and neurological patterns that lead to our habits make it difficult to change. There are wired reward systems in our brain, and they are already established. Changing habits involved finding new reward systems.
How to change your habit
The author describes the Habit Loop, which begins with some type of trigger or cue for the specific behavior. The behavior is the second part of the loop. If you can identify the trigger, you have the battle half beaten. This cue may be something like the time of day, situation, feeling, being in a certain room, or with a group of people.
Once you have identified the trigger, you can try to find different behaviors to satisfy that craving or urge. For example, perhaps you get bored on your job, so you go to the break room where there are all kinds of snacks. So you go in and eat some cookies. Is it really a snack you want, or you need a break from the monotony of the day? If you just need a break, how about thinking of something else you can do on your break. Can you take a short walk outside, walk up and down the stairs of the building, go talk to some coworkers or call a friend?
If you spend too much money, ask yourself what time of day, or day of the week do you tend to shop? Before you do any shopping take the time to write down your feelings. Are you bored, lonely, or angry? Can you do something else besides shop to take care of these emotions? Just having a written list of ideas of what you can do instead may be helpful. Perhaps you can watch a movie, meet a friend for coffee, engage in a hobby, go for a walk, etc.
More tools to break bad habits
Another behavioral method to change an unhealthy habit is to write down how many times a day you engage in that habit. Let’s say you want to quit smoking. Each day, make a hash mark on a piece of paper each time you smoke a cigarette. My guess is each day you will smoke less and less. Just being aware of this helps change the behavior-it is no longer mindless. You can also write down your triggers about what makes you want to have a cigarette. Is it anxiety? Is there something else you can do? Perhaps instead meditate, practice mindfulness, and do yoga, or simply leave the house.
Does your goal or habit seem overwhelming? Perhaps you can break it down into smaller steps. Like the saying goes: How do you eat an elephant? Once bite at a time. This is about finding something that is workable for you.
Therapy can also be helpful in maintaining new healthy habits. Just by saying it out loud to another person tends to make it more likely that you will stick with it. Your therapist can help you come up with a specific game plan to thwart your unhealthy behaviors.
If changing habits is something you want help with, please give me a call at 713-304-6554.
Happy New Year!
Debbie
